A Year of No Alcohol: Transformative Journey to Wellness
Twenty years ago, nearly 75% of adults under the age of 35 consumed alcohol. Today, that figure has dropped to around 62%.
Basically I’m not original because I decided to go a year without alcohol. I’m not a trendsetter. I made the decision to give sobriety a go during an explosion in the non alcoholic beverage market and the #sobercurious movement on social media. Because I was curious. Curious about these people who identified as sober or “sober curious” but did not identify as alcoholics. Curious about folks that weren’t going to twelve- step programs or hitting rock bottom, they were simply making the choice to stop consuming a substance that didn’t serve them. In May 2023, I decided to join them.
It’s wild to think a whole year has gone by now. Especially because I don’t think about alcohol that much anymore and I firmly believe that not drinking is the least interesting thing about me. Nevertheless, I think it’s worth reflecting anytime we make changes in our lives. The work I have put in to improve my mental and physical health does not begin or end with quitting booze. But let’s start there.
2. The Decision to Quit Alcohol
I started drinking when I was 18 years old. During my college years, I worked in bars and restaurants, hung out at restaurants and bars where my service industry friends worked, and even dated a couple of bartenders. I have had my fair share of nights out, all-day brunches, binge drinking weekends, hangovers and hangxiety. But as I got older, I lost that initial buzz I had for it.
By 2023 I was drinking quite infrequently. Dry January had stretched to Parched March, which was a bit longer than the sober break the year before. I started grad school to earn my master’s in social work while working full-time as a sex educator. It was and is a lot of work to manage both.
And then, we all had to secure internships by the end of our first year, and I knew I wanted a challenge - something to take me out of my comfort zone and help me learn some micro social work skills. So I found a placement as a clinician on the walk-in side of a crisis stabilization unit. I would be responsible for intake assessments for folks experiencing behavioral health crises, which could include psychosis, grief, suicidality, or substance use disorder.I knew that my already stressful life was about to get more intense and that my coping skills were about to be put to a very challenging test.
If you are going into the mental health profession, it’s important that you have a good handle on your own emotional well-being. I wanted to be my best self and the best social worker I could be for clients. And there was some work to do.
I finally sought support for ADHD, which was extremely helpful for reducing my anxiety. In addition to taking my medication, exercising regularly, meditating, journaling, and going to therapy, it seemed like not drinking was another simple way to improve my physical and mental health. After some research and an Andrew Huberman podcast - that’s it. I was done.
I have been learning a lot about substance use and addiction in school. While most people might know that a lot of people use substances because of trauma, people don’t usually know that 90% of people who do use substances don’t have any addiction or issues with substance misues at all. They choose to because they like it. It feels good.
Only about 10% of people who use substances struggle with misuse or addiction. And yes, a lot of folks might struggle with addictive behaviors because of childhood trauma, but it’s also often from social isolation. There is brilliant research on how a positive, social environment can prevent and/or support folks who are struggling with substance use disorder.
I don’t know if I would have qualified as having a substance use disorder at the time I decided to quit drinking. However, I do acknowledge that the periods when I drank the most often coincided with some of the most challenging times in my life. I did not want alcohol to be a coping mechanism for me, especially as I worked with clients who were seeking withdrawal management services. It turned out to be an easy decision for me that didn’t seem to have any downsides.
My experience might not be your experience. I know how hard it can be to stop using any mind-altering substances even if you want to. If you need support, you deserve support. There are many different support groups, medication assisted treatments, and therapeutic modalities that can help folks struggling with substance use.
I am also not here to convince anyone to stop using any substances. I believe in bodily autonomy, and am a strong supporter of harm reduction - not prohibition. That’s why I am not going to claim any labels. And because, to be honest, I don’t know if I will ever drink again (Edit: I had one drink in June. It took me forever to drink it and I just wasn’t really into it.) But I know that I would like my default setting to be sober.
2. Going Sober and Staying Social
Once I made the decision to stop drinking, I immediately noticed how much of a habit having a drink was. Even though I felt like I drank alcohol pretty irregularly by that point, it’s remarkable to notice how many activities revolve around drinking.
The first couple of months I relied a lot on the booming non alcoholic drink business. I had NA beers to go paddleboarding and camping. I drank so many flavors of seltzers. And I looked for mocktail NA spirits to fill the cute bar cart that I had bought not that long ago. Anytime I went out to a bar or restaurant there was something fun for me to drink, even if it was seltzer with a splash of juice and a lemon/lime.
It was interesting how many people noticed a non alcoholic beer can. I think folks are pretty familiar with Athletic beers and the like, but I was still surprised that I didn’t go as under the radar as I would have thought. (Pro Tip: If you want to avoid that kind of attention ask bartenders to put your drink in a glass and no one will be the wiser!)
But I will say I was also pleasantly surprised that people were so supportive. I didn’t really bring it up myself, but if someone else did they would usually say things like “Oh, cool, you’re not drinking?” or “They have NA Guinness!?” or “Yeah, I’ve been thinking about taking a break too.” If anyone is giving you a hard time about not drinking alcohol - that’s their problem. And they’re projecting.
It also helped that not drinking meant I left situations that were no longer fun, as soon as they were no longer fun. There is no buzz telling you that you’re having a better time than you actually are.
My social activities changed a lot overall. I did not relax from my work week at the bar. And I had more money to spend on other things, like activities or dinner and dessert at restaurants because I wasn’t spending any on booze. I definitely noticed some money shifts and financial benefits from quitting alcohol.
I have spent the last year doing more fun and self-care things than I have done in a long time. And that’s with a full-time job, school, and an internship. I have more things on my plate, but alcohol isn’t one of them.
2. Mental Health & Sobriety
There are many in-depth resources out there that can explain how alcohol impacts the mind and your mental health. But one fact immediately helped me understand why alcohol feels like such a great way to decompress, or ease high levels of anxiety. I was terribly shy and insecure when I first started drinking, and it definitely took the edge off social situations. Even as an adult, I genuinely felt more relaxed after a drink. Was this all in my head?
It was freeing to know that no, it’s not just a me (or you) thing, or in anybody’s head - that’s what alcohol does. It’s science! Alcohol has both sedative and stimulant effects, which can help suppress symptoms of anxiety or stress in the moment and give people more energy. The challenge, however, is that when the alcohol wears off (even just one drink) anxiety levels increase.
But it is completely understandable that folks reach for this substance then, because it does create some short-lived relief from anxious feelings. And aren’t we all trying to find coping mechanisms that work?
The problem is that even if it is a coping mechanism for the moment, it ultimately makes you more anxious, decreases sleep quality, dehydrates you, and gives you hangxiety.
Once I removed alcohol as a coping mechanism, I had to find others. This was one of the biggest motivators for me to try sobriety for a year, especially as an aspiring mental health professional with a hectic schedule and a history of burnout.
These are three coping mechanisms that I actually had to start using:
Completing the stress response cycle at the end of the work day through movement .
For me this was the gym, a walk, a jog, or some yoga. I know we hear this all the time. But it’s true. Just do something you like to do. It doesn’t have to be intense. Close your laptop and go around the block just to reset your nervous system.
Spending time with other humans.
This doesn’t always feel easy, especially when we are all strapped for time. Socializing can also feel like a heavy emotional lift. But when I hang with the right people, I always feel better. You can try implementing something called a power hang (instead of power hour), where you meet with someone for one hour only. This could be a walk, a tea, or something short.
Getting creative.
I am not what I would consider an artistic person. But this past year, I started making collages in my journals, making cards for people for their birthdays, and really just doing more things with my hands. I also started crocheting but that didn’t go very far to be honest. The important thing for me was to find a creative outlet that was not attached to any kind of goals or achievement. This is play time.
It’s helpful to have multiple coping mechanisms because everyday is different. I do know that these things genuinely work, if I make time for them. I may have to block off my calendar to find that time, but by not drinking alcohol and staying up late I find that there are more free hours than before.
And as I said at the top of the article, there are a lot more people who are sober or sober curious than you might think. Find those people!
3. Physical Health Benefits
Our physical and mental health are very much intertwined, so it’s hard to feel mentally well if you’re not feeling physically well or vice versa. There are a lot of physical health benefits from sobriety, but there are also a lot of people who have already written about it in great detail, so I won’t.
But for a quick overview of physical health benefits -
Alcohol impacts your sleep, which impacts your whole life. I definitely have better sleep and more energy, especially on the weekends.
Alcohol can also mess with your gut and microbiome health, which is linked to increased anxiety, depression, and stress.
Not drinking can support your immune system. Even with more stress in my own life, I do think I felt better than I would have if I had been drinking, and was able to recover faster when I did get sick.
My nutrition and overall body image has greatly improved. I am not necessarily as thin as I have been in previous years of life, and that is not my goal. But I am taking better care of myself and being more active in general. Naturally by giving up booze, my body is healthier, happier, and I like the way it looks a little more.
Building New sober Habits and Finding Support
My body and mind were able to formulate new habits within a couple of months. And for that, I am truly grateful. As I have said - my experience quitting alcohol may not be yours. We all have different support systems, tools, identities, privileges, and they can all play a role.
Everyone deserves to have a community that supports them, as well as any other tools they want or need. You can find sober groups, join twelve-step programs, get sober apps to connect with others, utilize withdrawal management or therapeutic services.
If you want to go sober, sober curious, or just drink less, I definitely encourage you to do what feels right! I always like to question my habits, experiment with adding or removing different practices and rituals, because I think that’s what life is about - learning, feeling and doing our best for ourselves so we can do that for each other. I support you if you do or do not imbibe! I promise we can still have a good time.
If you want someone to talk to, you can go to Psychology Today and find a therapist, call 988 the crisis line, or find me on socials if you want to connect.
